Been a long time since I've written here.  Getting ready for bed, hallucinating on Ambien.  Thinking about passing out.  Dogs are all snuggled up and Matt is finishing his work.  Time is passing somewhat quickly, but I'm content in the moment.  I'm pretty sure that my meds are messing me all up.  Going to request to try some different meds.  I feel dissociated and neutral.  I go from a high to a low rather quickly sometimes.  Therapist is out of town for 3 weeks.  Going to try and find an alternative method.  One of my best friends is coming to stay with us for a while here soon. I'm really excited about that. My birthday is soon as well, I'm hoping that Matt and I can treat ourselves.  He doesn't seem that interested in doing much for our birthdays.  I guess he is 9 years ahead of me. Hopefully I can make it special for him though. Things have been majorly up and down and in and out lately.  Not sure what's going on with my mind or my body.  It is rather frustrating, hopefully I can finally get into the doctors since I got my insurance and cards all straightened out.  Well, that's all for now.  I will write more later when I'm not heading to bed.

Rest peacefully, broken ones.